The Blog at pwfisher.com

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A great read. The court actually says they ought to have an Inquisition like Spain. This was a P.R. disaster for the crown. Worth giving the guy an entire state in the colonies just to get him out of the country.

Georgia? King. Virginia? Queen. Maryland? Queen. Carolina? King. Pennsylvania? Seditious Quaker preacher. Nice.

The Trial of William Penn and William Mead, 1670

Foreman. Here is our Verdict; holding forth a piece of paper to the clerk of the peace, which follows.

'We the jurors, hereafter named, do find William Penn to be Guilty of speaking or preaching to an assembly, met together in Gracechurch-street, the 14th of August last, 1670, And that William Mead is Not Guilty of the said Indictment.'

Foreman Thomas Veer, Edward Bushel, John Hammond, Henry Henley, Charles Milson, Gregory Walklet, John Baily, William Lever, Henry Michel, John Bnghtman, James Damask, Wil. Plumsted.

Obser. This both Mayor and Recorder resented at so high a rate, that they exceeded the bounds of all reason and civility.

Mayor. ... addressing himself to the foreman, I thought you, had understood your place better.

Recorder. Gentlemen, you shall not be dismissed till we have a verdict that the court will accept; and you shall be locked up, without meat, drink, fire, and tobacco; you shall not think thus to abuse the court; we will have a verdict, by the help of God, or you shall starve for it.

Penn. My jury, who are my judges, ought not to be thus menaced; their verdict should be free, and not compelled; the bench ought to wait upon them, but not forestal them. I do desire that justice may be done me, and that the arbitrary resolves of the bench may not be made the measure of my jury's verdict.

Recorder. Stop that prating fellow's mouth, or put him out of the court.

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I'm mirroring this in an attempt to get it to display well on my iPhone, since it's cold and I'd like to read it under the covers. With my wireless headphones playing ambient internet radio, it'll be a nice way to drop off to sleep.

This is actually a commented, updated version of the essay.
The Command Line in 2004 by Garrett Birkel.

Here's my iPhone friendly version.

BAM! To behold, a public bulletin board, built of both brilliance and barbarity by bastards with boners. This bastion, no mere bulwark of boredom, is a brutal barrage of blistering bullshit, barely benevolent… but behind the bigotry and boobs, beyond the bitter broadcasts of bragging buffoons: here be the body politic. A brotherhood of blasphemy, blessed with more balls than brains, battling the bland, the bogus, the benign. Bedlam? Bring it on. But I babble… better to be brief. You may call me /b/.
– Anonymous

It is no longer available in its original location, so I'll archive it here.